My birthday…23 years old

“When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, ‘I used everything you gave me’. -Erma Bombeck

A new day has started
One year older I turned

I chose to celebrate my age a bit differently this time
So I sat down and wrote this poem, rhyme by rhyme

And so, as I wake up to greet twenty three years
I look not in sorrow, but in happy tears

Thank you God for giving me this beautiful day
I trust that you will make it special in every way

I made it this far because of you, Lord
And further still may I go in your graces, oh God

One more candle on my birthday cake this year 
The more they become, the more I fear

As I count all my blessings
And remember all my failings

I thank you, God, that I have made it this far
My light, as ever, shining as bright as a star

As my unknown future opens up to me
This I promise, I will strive to be what I can be

A special thank you to all my family and friends
Whose love and support I appreciate to no end

You have stood by me through thick and thin
And I know you would do the same, yet again

Thank you, God, for one more year granted
For giving me the chance to do what I wanted

Friend zoned? How to escape it and date your crush…

“To burn with desire and keep quiet about it is the greatest punishment we can bring on ourselves.”

-Federico Garcia

Damn!!! I doubt there is anything more depressing in this world than being friend zoned. You know, when you got strong feelings for that guy/girl that is supposed to be your ”close friend” and they either do not have any idea completely and look at you as a friend or do not feel the same way back. You get my drift now!! Aint that a b***h???

The greatest wish of anyone in the above situation would of course be to step out of this “zone” and get the girl/guy of their dreams. But do this wrong and you risk losing it all, including your friendship!! Dilemma!! Dilemna!!

Here are a few tips that might help you break the cycle. Of course it may not work and the two of you may not be meant for each other, but wouldn’t you rather know than guess?? These tips should be worth a try!!!

#15 Remove your shoulder

Now don’t take this literally. But the truth is, you are probably in the friend zone in the first place because you have always been the shoulder for your crush to cry on. Whenever their relationships sour, you are the one to pick them up and offer them advice.

Stop playing this role. While it is always important to treat your crush with respect, do not become their doormat. Make it known that you do not exactly like hearing about other girls or boys all the time…

#14 Step up your game

You may be flirting with your crush, but if you are still in the friend zone, then you obviously aren’t doing it right. It may be time to step it up a level.

Next time you are talking to your crush hold their gaze a bit longer than you normally do. Compliment them to let them know that you think they look amazing tonight. It’s the small things that matter, that make them start thinking of your potential as more than just a friend.

#13 Get Physical

It’s time to introduce subtle touch as a flirtation method! It might sound a little scary, but physical touch is actually the most effective method of flirting.

Next time you’re sitting at a table, playfully tap his or her foot with your own. Next time you’re having a conversation, take a small risk and place your hand on theirs to emphasize a point.
Another great tip, particularly if your crush is a female, is to place your hand on her back whilst you’re both out at a bar. It’s subtle, yet effective physical affection like this that will help you break down that friend zone barrier!

#12 Sample Dates

The benefit of being in the friend zone, as opposed to barely being acquainted with your crush at all, is that you can hang out with them one-on-one without it being weird. Use these hang-outs to do date-like activities, and you’ll reintroduce the idea of a relationship to them. For example, when you go out for a movie, ask her out for dinner afterwards.
If he or she really enjoys spending time with you, they will even begin to suggest more of these “dates” until they turn into the real thing. Spending time together in a dating atmosphere allows the two of you to realize just how great you are with one another – Bonus!

#11 Friend Power

Perhaps it’s time you recruited a wingman or wingwoman!! When you first met your crush, it’s only natural that they subconsciously weighed you up as a potential partner or not. However, if you’ve been put in the friend zone, then it’s time that you got your friends to subtly help you escape it.
For example, if you’re trying to please a guy, get some of your other friends to talk about how great you are to him.

It may sound cheesy, but if you can find friends you trust to help you out, then it could be the nudge in the right direction that you’re after

#10 Chivalry Isn’t Dead

There’s nothing more attractive than a gentleman, so if you’re a male hoping to escape the friend zone, then you had better become a lot more chivalrous! Have dignity for yourself, and treat her with all of the respect that she hopes for in a partner.
Open doors for her, or if she’s cold, offer her your jacket. Its moves like these, without going too overboard, that shows her you have manners and that you respect her as a woman, not just as your “mate”. Another important tip is to never blatantly check out other females in front of her. This is an ultimate turn-off and it will communicate the idea to her that you don’t find her attractive.

#9 The Break-Up

Things between your crush and you may be tricky if your crush is actually in a relationship! The first thing you’re probably thinking of doing is trying to break up the happy couple, but we strongly recommend against doing this! Not only will it dramatically decrease your chances of ever escaping the friend zone, but it may also eradicate you from your crush’s life altogether.
Envy is an unattractive quality in anyone, so don’t let it rear it’s ugly green head! Instead, try to show your crush that even though they’re in a relationship, they’re still important to you

#8 Break The Stereotype

Chances are that you’re being super nice and over-the-top sweet to your love interest, correct? Many guys or girls who end up in the friend zone fit into the stereotypical “nice guy / girl” category. While there’s nothing wrong with being nice (in fact, it’s something to be congratulated about), the problem is that you most likely don’t voice your opinions or say ‘no’ when you want to.
The nice guy / girl is typically afraid of hurting other people’s feelings, so they constantly get the raw end of the deal because they are unable to speak up for themselves. If you want your crush to earn more respect for you, it’s time you communicate your own needs and have more respect for yourself!

#7 Favor Time

If you’ve been friend zoned, it’s probably because you’re the one who will always do anything they ask you to do. But do you ever ask them to help you out too? Chances are you don’t in fear of them getting annoyed, but if you want them to value you as more than a friend, they’re going to have to invest in the relationship too!
Simple things such as asking for help with an assignment. It makes your crush begin to feel needed in little ways, it will transform your friendship and help it to advance. When both parties involved begin to realize that they can rely on one another, then this can only be a good thing!

#6 Healthy Competition

A little healthy competition has never been bad for anyone! If someone feels as though they could lose something, it all of a sudden becomes more precious to them. You probably make your crush a priority, but they’ve friend zoned you and made you an option, right?
Perhaps it’s time to make some new friends? If you begin spending more time with another person of the opposite sex, it’s only natural that your crush may become a little jealous. While a little jealousy may prompt them to begin to value you as a person more highly, deliberately going out of your way to make them super jealous will only destroy your friendship (and any future chance of moving into the love zone). So play this card very carefully…

#5 Absence

You know the saying, “absence makes the heart grown fonder”! Your crush has got used to you always being there, and as a result, they’ve begun to take your presence for granted. It’s only when we notice some distance between those we’re close to that we begin to realize just how much their company means to us. It’s true!
While we’re not asking you to suddenly become a bad friend who suddenly never wants to hang out, we’re just suggesting that it’s beneficial to not spend 24/7 with one another. Perhaps you have other friends you’ve been neglecting? Your occasional absence will make your crush appreciate the time they spend with you more

#4 Makeover Time
Now am not suggesting you hit the stores in search of the latest fashion. Instead, I am suggesting that your crush, because they have known you for long, have become used to who you are as a person and you probably don’t excite them any longer.
If you’ve been thinking about a change of hairstyle or attitude, then perhaps now is the time! You’ve got nothing to lose. Start to look at the world around you with new eyes, and a fresh new change. Your crush will suddenly begin to take a lot more notice of you. Plus, they say change is as good as a holiday, so you’ll be treating your own self-confidence too.

#3 Needy Never Works

Whether your crush is a guy or a girl, one thing is for certain. Nobody likes a needy person, whether they’re your boyfriend / girlfriend or not! Neediness is the ultimate turn-off, and this could very well be a reason why you’ve been sentenced to the friend zone.
If your crush is busy, don’t panic and begin to ask them if they’re free the next day instead. Play it cool and don’t act too desperate for their time and attention, otherwise they will begin to take you for granted.
Sometimes you need to make your crush want to spend time with you, rather than you always being the one to initiate spending time together.

#2 Just Say It!

So you’re stuck in the friend zone and you don’t know why? Perhaps it’s because your crush doesn’t know you actually like them more than a friend! It might sounds scary, but one of the most important things you can do to escape the friend zone is just tell your crush how you feel in the hope that they feel the same way back.

You never know what will happen! It’s better to risk some embarrassment for the chance of finally dating your love interest.

#1 When All Else Fails

Okay, so you’ve tried absolutely everything, including telling your crush how you feel but to no success? Looks like it is hard decision time…Staying friends with someone who isn’t romantically interested in you when you have strong feelings for them is going to begin to mess with your mind after a while.
By spending time with them constantly, you are only hurting yourself. For reasons you will probably never know, they simply just aren’t attracted to you. It’s wise to try to remain friends with them, but not to see them or talk to them as often.
Explain to your crush that you can’t help your feelings, and you can’t help theirs either, but it’s time you tried to move on. It’s time for you now to untie those heart strings and to start searching for someone just as attractive to you. There’s plenty more fish in the sea, and you deserve to find true love, just like everyone else.

So there you have it. My moment of clarity in a sea of uncertainty!! Now am not saying that any of the above will work. It may ruin your life as you know it.

But I guess, you gotta ask yourself, is your life as it is with your secret crush at the moment worth it?? If the answer is no, then you have got nothing to lose, but everything to gain.

I know this has been a long read and I appreciate you keeping strong till the end. You my loyal readers are awesome. Thank you for taking the time to read this, and as usual, if you have anything to add or point out, hit me up with a comment.